It’s wild to read all the #cystic fibrosis posts on Tumblr now. I feel like when I started there were very few. I don’t know if this has anything to do with my lack of creativity or inspiration when it comes to posting recently, but I just thought it was interesting. It’s interesting to just scroll through all of the posts and see what everyone is doing. Some people are running marathons, some are biking, others are in and out of the hospitals, others are remembering lost ones, and in the end it kind of leaves me speechless.
I don’t know what to say or write or be. I am every one of those posts. I feel more connected to those posts than to most of my college peers. I want to continue to write on here, but I don’t know what to say without becoming monotonous.
Maybe I’m too worried about followers and likes. I don’t know. My friend, who has a pretty popular tumblr, maintains an internet presence. And it’s absurd, he literally has to edit everything he posts or says on the internet, to the point that our private conversations get to be like that and I have to remind him to be real. I have to remind him to be himself. And I’m wondering if that is what happened here. I want to be more honest but maybe my complete, unbridled honesty isn’t something I’m ready to put on this blog. I don’t know.